This Was Honestly Written on Monday

           So it's Monday again! And in the effort of returning to a regular posting schedule I'm writing this before I go to the gym. This morning I weighed in at 7.2kg, which is roughly 13st 11lbs. I believe that is because I weighed myself after breakfast - rookie mistake - so I hold out hope that I've actually lost weight since last week. The all-you-can-eat Chinese on Saturday won't have helped that goal though.

            At the time of writing I feel fat. I'm at 1200 of 1420 calories and a massive 900 (approx) of those were for lunch. It's a horrible mix of sleepiness, pain and being satisfied. However, I decided to eat so much because my last few gym visits have burned more calories than I ate on those days. Which sounds great except I was literally running on empty for the last 20 minutes or so - not an enjoyable experience. Especially as the television offerings were not very palatable; the Antiques Roadshow failed to steal my attention from work out pains.

            Which brings me to the point of this post; tactical distraction. This applies to both dieting and exercise, so should hold some value regardless of why you read this. I'll start with the diet side.

            Hunger strikes. Undeniably, it does so with an accuracy and reoccurring frequency that would turn lightning electric green with envy. Someone once told me your stomach has two modes - full & empty. After some thought my take on this is that your stomach is a binary communicator - like a spoilt and ungrateful child it only talks to you when it wants something. The rest of the time its communication skills are off. It is an air-raid siren; when it speaks it is only ever bad news.

            Worse, it's needy. While you relax and have no other worries - while you are otherwise perfectly content -  it will bother you, niggle at your mind, worry at your attention like a very small dog with no teeth until you sate it. Even when it doesn't really need feeding. This is mainly where the danger lies; when you're feeling safe and secure it will hit your empty mind with a demand to be made full. It will fill your mind with the demand to be full until it's all you can think about. So you cave.

            Your muscles do something similar during exercise. They cry out in desperation as your work them, like a pack of fat children sent into the mines for the first time. The more you work, the more they complain and weep lactic acid tears until you're convinced the one and only thing you can do is stop and break down, joining them in their misery and eventual relief.

            Yes, distraction is the escape plan! Hungry? Do something! Read a book, play a game, go for a walk (away from food retailers), just do something! If your mind is distracted by active or cognitive functions, concentrated on more serious bodily concerns the your hunger will be sidelined. Muscle burn and fatigue is a tougher signal to jam. To begin with if you're exercising well you'll be using a variety of muscles groups and the will bombard you in merciless bio-electrical unison. Again, your mind craves less base stimulus. Music helps, films more so if you can find one you like and something to watch it on. Conversation is the best distraction I've found but I do end up speaking quite loudly in an unfortunately Ron Burgundy-esque fashion (1:36).

            So, what, in fact, is my advice? Prepare distractions when you get ready to go. Got a tablet? Download some films. Bring you phone along and some ear buds. Prepare a playlist that will keep you heart pounding and your brain in the primal state designed by evolution to keep you running from large, angry predators. Go with a friend and gossip a bit (as long as you're okay sharing it with half the gym if you're anything like me) or compete with them.

            You mind is designed to protect your body; unless you actively resist your willpower will give out long before you damage your muscles with exercise. It sounds difficult to believe but that's your brain already working its protective, subconscious magic. Do not plateau. Do not surrender to the temptation of weakness. Do not be Samwell Tarly. Nature did not design the human body to be inactive, unresponsive or weak. You have the fluid grace of a pouncing tiger, the raw strength of an angry gorilla and the undying determination of the lone wolf inside you - you just have to find it. I've spent awhile unearthing it and I'm still doing so. I'm hoping it's like an iceberg and there's a lot more yet to dig up. The only obstacle is your reasoned self-doubt and & your very human susceptibility to self-delusion. Your ability to do a thing is measured first by your belief you can do it, not by your actual ability to. (0:22)

            You may even find new things to enjoy - somehow the Narnia films have got me through a couple of runs despite my original dislike for them. So prepare you distractions, ignore the pleas and pains your body bombards you with and battle towards a brighter, lighter you.